My Twitter homepage is so algorithmed, I literally can no longer use it to see the things people I follow recently posted.
My Tumblr dashboard is dead except for the "Rich Dads Pittsburgh Edition" video ad that loads every time I scroll to the bottom of the page and invoke the infinite scroll load.
Instagram features a promoted post every 10th post.
Facebook shows me posts once they've been seen by a zillion other people.
Snapchat makes no sense, but in its defense fundamentally shows me things either sent to me or posted in stories by people I know. And mercifully, those posts disappear after a short period of time, whether I notice them or not.
I don't know how the television remote control works so forget about that thing.
My dog wants to play the same game, the one with the ball and the running, every day. He's nothing if not predictable. I should let him out soon.
I thought I was noticing how social media diversions I used to love have become uninteresting, but it turns out I'm just noticing my weight ticking up a pound, the circles under my eyes darkening, the imaginary ticking of the digital clock strapped to my wrist measuring out heartbeats for a recipe nobody ever completes.