Old Guy 1: You should sit in the whirlpool.
Old Guy 2: Whirlpool? I go in the sauna.
Old Guy 1: Sauna? You should try sitting in the whirlpool.
Old Guy 2: Nah. The whirlpool is full of germs.
Old Guy 1: Germs? Just don't go at nine o'clock.
Old Guy 2: Why? What happens then?
Old Guy 1: That's when all the old people go…
Old Guy 1: …and it's full of women. You could really impress the women.
Me: What time did you say, again?
Old Guys: {uproarious laughter}
Me: Don't act like I won't see you there.
Old Guys: {even more uproarious laughter}
Me: Why are you laughing?
Old Guy 1: Dollar to a donut says you're going to be at work by 9:00…
Old Guy 2: …so we get the whirlpool full of women to ourselves!
Old Guys: {even MORE uproarious laughter}
Me: Don't forget the old people.
Old Guys: {the most uproarious laughter, followed by coughing and wheezing that serves them right, the selfish jerks :( }